Sign My Guestbook!
September 14, 2001 -
Today I've lost it. Let's just put it out there. I'm not dealing well with the events of this week. I'd like just to hang out with a few, select friends and enjoy their company. I'll let the their comfort wrap around me like an old, welcome blanket.
Quite frankly, I feel incredibly blessed at the number of people in the SCA who put up with me. I'm really used to having a very few number of people that I trust and watch out for. Incredible as it seems to me, Bob, Laura, Quinten, Tara, Rob, Wendy, Alan, Jen, Lisette, Greg and Mel are all people that in the last three years I have added to what was otherwise a very, very small list. But right now, I guess I just need to go back to my roots. Small.
I was supposed to go to the Ren Faire this weekend. I wouldn't go except a couple of very important people could only go this weekend. However, what started as a group of 6, is now about 18. Not one of the people in this larger group would ever be unwelcome at my home, in fact, I think every one of them has been to my house. Please understand that each and every one of you is important to me. But right now I just can't handle it. Right now I don't want to do the Renfaire, I don't want to be in large crowds, and since Bob and Laura have company, I'm bowing out. I know I'm psycho, and I have no doubt that this will hurt some feelings. All I can say is that I'm sorry, and I hope you just let me get away with this one.
So instead, I'll spend the weekend with 4 other important people. I'll hang out, and let Chris beat the hell out of me on the playstation. Diana wants to drink some tonight. But over all, I'm just going to try and enjoy life on my terms. This weekend, I need to be me. I know that is selfish, but that is just the way it is. For those of you that were at LC last night, that is why I left earlier, far earlier than I normally do.
I try not to wig out on you guys often. I really try to put on my best face. But this weekend I just need to disapear for a while, to escape. I hope you all understand.
i'm out (but i'll be back)
�
�