Friday, July 27, 2001 -

Jim: Welcome party fans to Slippery Rock, PA. I'm Jim Johnson, I come from The Middle, and beside me is Chuck Tu. We're here to preview the kick off of the SCAdian party season at this 30th Pennsic War.

Chuck: That's right Jim, and what better way to find out what a treat we have in front of us, than to look back at some of the events and people who have made the Pennsic party season what it is today. Jim, who should we look at first?

Jim: Chuck, let's look first at a second year veteran who all ready has some thinking he's a sure first ballot hall of famer. Hailing from somewhere south, Bart Ditchdweller took Pennsic by storm last year.

Chuck: No doubt about it, he was the talk of the Serengeti. It always helps to be part of a strong team, and with such names as Little Tony, Danny and Andrew on your side, it's hard not to have a great showing. But Bart out did himself last year, and wasted no time doing it.

Jim: Dead on, Chuck. Bart showed incredible initiative. He had been in Pennsic less than 24 hours before he was found in a ditch. This guy really knows how to lay it all on the line for the party.

Chuck: A great individual effort by Bart kicked off last years party season well. But let's go back and revisit the Lost Boys overall performance from last year.

Jim: One word sums it up, Chuck: Champions. When it came time to choose the best party team at Pennsic, there was no competition. Even the contingent from Dumbekistan had to give it up for the Lost Boys.

Chuck: There was of course some ugly rumors regarding Party Performance Enhancing Drugs, but no one believes those.

Jim: Chuck, it's disgraceful that anyone would sink low enough in this noble sport to level such unwarranted charges. I hope that those responsible remember that this country was founded by great partiers, and this just isn't the way things are done. Enough of that negativity though. Chuck, what other top individual performers did we have last year?

Chuck: No doubt you'll remember lovely Kimberly the Flight Attendant. Her leadership really pulled together Team Wild Women as they took the Men Without Pant's party by storm.

Jim: That is one party that will never be the same.

Chuck: Kim's straight to the point attitude and unyielding dedication to having a good time, both with herself and with others, really shows why she's one of the standout partiers of the year. And Jim, rumor has it that this year her skills will be matched with the legendary e-knight, after a block buster trade where the Wild Women got a keg and two cabana boys to be named later in exchange for Kim�s services.

Jim: That duo is one of the favorites this year to really break out and lead the pack. The e-knight has set himself up for a strong showing by volunteering to lead the Barracuda Party for the second consecutive year. His ability to front load a ragged band of humanity, drag them through the depths of the bog, and bring them back just short of needing dialysis is his claim to fame. No one else can balance these delicate duties.

Chuck: Speaking of balance, what about the T-Twins? Even though they've been flung to the far parts of the known world, they always manage to bring it back together and party hardy!

Jim: I can't believe you said party hardy, Chuck, I really can�t. Anyways, despite rumors of internal bickering, the T-Twins got together on the off-season for some out of country training. Reports indicate that the emerald isle will never be the same.

Chuck: What may have even more impact on our grand sport is the formation of the Lost Causers! One of the T-Twins has a hard decision to make, should she throw her lot in with the LCs, or try and balance out her commitment to her sister and her other team mates. Only time will tell.

Jim: The Lost Causers face some obstacles this year, in that they've been split from their normal stomping grounds. With half the group in another camp, they're going to have to expend extra effort to come out on top. How are they going to overcome this obstacle?

Chuck: The grizzled veteran is going to have to come through, Jim. His leadership last year at the ring of fire was incredible, half his team and an unnamed pair of boots caught fire, and yet everyone emerged safely. He took that bottle of everclear and carried his team on his back that night.

Jim: That's right, Chuck, you gotta think that a lifetime achievement award is in the works for this guy.

Chuck: A true legend, Jim.

Jim: Well, on that note, we have to sign out. Tune in tomorrow, and we'll preview this year's party opportunities, and pick the projected top individual and team performers. We�ll also look at some of the rookies that are expected to make an impact their first year. Finally, InLondon will not be, and that�s sure to have a positive affect on the overall partying at Pennsic. I'm Jim Johnson, I come from the middle...

Chuck: Jesus that joke�s lame. i'm out

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